I'm not your bitch, don't hang your shit on me.

Friday, May 26, 2006


What goes around, comes around what goes up must come down
Now who’s cryin’, desirin’ to come back to me…

Alicia Keys couldn’t have sung it better when referring to a friend or lover who realized their mistakes and wants to return to the ways of old.

Sometimes they’re welcomed back with open arms, and other times they’re not so lucky.

Years ago, I had a best friend who I’ll call BF. Since our families were close, we became fast friends. We were inseparable. We did everything together. If you ever needed to find Steven, there was BF, and vice-versa.

As we grew older, we grew further apart in small ways. The WWF and video games really didn’t interest me, and he didn’t care for classic cinema and architecture.

Then, in one fell swoop, the phone calls stopped being answered and the meetings – albeit awkward – were few and far in-between.

Suddenly, he wanted to be part of the “cool” crowd, and would do anything to join. I, being someone who was always on the fringes, didn’t really care about them because I could give some cred to whatever group I associated myself with.

BF changed clothes, hair, attitude and schools so he could be closer to my friends. He began to spread false stories that I (supposedly) told him, allowing my friends to call me at night wondering why he would say these lies. After consoling them, they realized I wouldn’t betray them like that. They trusted me and not him.

Soon after alienating his new friends and colleagues, he had no one. He was alone. It didn’t matter if BF couldn’t go outside, because no one wanted to play with him.

And, so, he came back to me.

It began with a few phone calls (I didn’t answer), then it was requests to go out (I never RSVPd), and finally, it would cumulate in a family dinner (I was cordial, and pretended to care, but didn’t give a flip about anything he said).

BF threw away a good thing when he had it, but never realized how he good he had it until he threw it away. But, now it’s too late. I have moved on and won’t come back, again.


What goes around comes around and bites you in the ass.


Blogger tornwordo said...

What's wrong with forgiving him though. Mercy isn't all bad.

May 26, 2006 6:16 am  
Blogger Kevin said...

Sometimes you have to protect yourself from being hurt again ... and by not allowing that person in, you prevent them from being able to do the same to you.

I'm kind of dealing with a similar issue right now. I'm tentative because I know I'll open up completely, leaving myself to be walked all over again.

It killed me the first time -- I don't know if i could let it happen again.

May 26, 2006 9:41 am  
Blogger Steven said...

Torn and Six: Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me. Fool me thrice, I must suffer from memory loss.

May 26, 2006 5:26 pm  

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