I'm not your bitch, don't hang your shit on me.

Monday, April 29, 2013

Break up before meeting

One of the best things from "meeting" people online is you get to justify a lot of the craziness that really exists with actual proof.  An example of this is when I was chatting with C.  There are a few back and forth messages before I ask about meeting up.  I don't hear back.  For a while.  Then, I get a long and rambling text back when I don't expect it.

Sorry,, been werkin extra the past few and to be honest, I accidentally deleted your text , so it was great that you called.
Wed is a NUTS day for me,, so hope we can chat on thurs.

I look at it and roll my eyes.  Then, there's another text when I don't reply.


I reply, reluctantly with a passive-aggressive, "Yes?"

Sorry for not getting back been busy.

Within 20 seconds, I get another rambling text.  And it answers a lot of questions I never asked and one that clarified something I had long suspected.

When we first connected i didnt think things wud develop with another person and i was wrong so i am giving this a chance.  I have a feeling ur a great guy but i wid be really unfair to not see if where im at will work out.  I dont think from youre pic i cud tewll who u were on the street but if we coross paths say hi.

So, C is breaking up with me even before meeting up.  The clarification?  C is nuts.  What I later find out is that C has been hooking around (and even repeatedly hitting on a friend of mine), yet was playing games with me for kicks.  Did I mention C is 40?  Yup, that's one relationship I'm glad that ended before it began.

Monday, April 01, 2013

Even cheerleaders need cheerleaders

There are people in my social circle who like to talk to me to enlighten their mood.  I'm the cheerleader who tries to build their confidence by telling them they're smart, pretty, desirable, etc.

The reason why it's not reciprocated is because people think I've got it all together.  And, for the most part, I do.  But, you know what?  It's not easy to always keep it together.  I don't wake up in a fairy tale.  Sometimes I doubt myself.  Sometimes I have shitty days.  Sometimes I want to scream in frustration as to why things aren't going my way. 

It's hard work to keep things in check.  Not only for my job, but for my constituents.  And I'm not even getting into any extracurricular activities I partake in.  It's exhausting having to be that person for everyone else.

Even cheerleaders need to have a cheerleaders.  I don't care if it's a stupid cheer.  At least it would put a smile on my face.

U.  G.  L.  Y.  You ain't got no alibi.  You ugly.  Ooh ooh, you ugly...