I'm not your bitch, don't hang your shit on me.

Friday, January 19, 2007

Flake

Being someone who values – and even treasures – his personal space, I find it difficult to disrespect that of others. If I don’t want anyone breaching my comfort zone, then I shouldn’t breach anyone else's.

Unless there’s a reason to.

Sometimes when talking to someone (either I know well, or don’t know at all), I see something in their hair that captures my attention, like a ball of string for a cat. After trying to pretend I’m paying attention to their conversion, I think it’s a piece of fluffy lint. But, it’s not. It’s a rather large flake of dandruff.

As much as I want to reach across the vacant space between us (without excusing myself), dig into their hair, pick out that offending piece of dandruff, flick it off to the side, and then pretend nothing happened while they look at me in shock and disbelief, I don’t.

It would be rude.

So, I pay attention to what they’re saying and pretend there isn’t a motherfuckin’ flake in their hair for the rest of the time together.

Note: You don't want to know what happens when I see a booger up someone's nose.

10 Comments:

Blogger A Lewis said...

Screw that...I'd reach right out and touch someone. And I'd flick the flake outta their hair too. I say: Breach the Comfort Zones!!!

January 19, 2007 1:06 am  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Perhaps it is a measure of the level of relationship. If a bud or a friend is close enough (in our mutual relationship) for me to flick the flake of dandruff - and he/she to do the same for me, then in my mind we have a good thing going.

January 19, 2007 5:58 am  
Blogger Timmy said...

dont hate the flake!

January 19, 2007 7:43 am  
Blogger Kevin said...

It wasn't dandruff. My scalp burned in the sun (damn thinning hair) and it was peeling. I swear.

The other question, why did you have to cup my balls when you flicked the flake?

January 19, 2007 11:44 am  
Blogger Earl said...

It's just grooming a loved one. If monkeys can do it...why can't we?

January 19, 2007 10:56 pm  
Blogger tornwordo said...

You can pluck out my boogers any time.

January 20, 2007 7:09 am  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

You know, you could politely just tell them. I'd rather someone tell me there's a problem, and maybe how to fix it, rather than being left to look like a fool.

But this dilemma seems to be one of the oldest ones out there.

January 20, 2007 12:29 pm  
Blogger Sh@ney said...

ROFLMAO...Ahh you too funny...
I remember at primary school, my best friend always had a nose full of green crustations, it was sickening & humiliating to see it, but he never seemed bothered by it...That was 25 years ago, I often wonder if he is still wearing the same look.

January 20, 2007 7:15 pm  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Holy schidt!!! I do this all the time. I can't help myself. I will even have a person ask me if I'm ok when they see the bulging vein in my head from trying to resist the urge to pluck the lint from their jacket or spinach in their teeth.
kb

January 21, 2007 6:44 pm  
Blogger about a boy said...

i admit. i do it too.

January 24, 2007 11:13 am  

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