I'm not your bitch, don't hang your shit on me.

Friday, March 09, 2007

Name withheld

Every so often, I pass by a selection of magazines and flip through them to kill the time between scheduled appointments. From the ads to the articles, there is usually something that grabs my attention.

This time isn’t any different.

The first few pages typically contain letters to the editor, and the one which holds particular significance is usually bolded and in a larger font size. The one I'm reading is quite good. It’s literate, has a great flow and is snappy. It’s signed “name withheld.”

And, it’s also mine.

I can’t believe the editor of the magazine would use my letter and not even acknowledge me. The nerve. Haven’t they ever heard of the journalistic code of ethics?

So what do I do? I write a letter to the editor, like every passive-aggressive bitch does.

Hi, D.
Hope all is well.
Just wanted to say that I picked up the latest issue of the magazine and in the first few pages saw a pleasant surprise: my letter to you... which was signed "name withheld."
Not to put you on the spot, but is there a reason for protecting my privacy? I'm not Tom Cruise, or George Clooney.
I thought it would've been cool to see my name on the bottom of the letter.
Again, I'm not pointing a finger at you (or the mag), but it has left me scratching my head.
Best,
Steven.

About a day, or so, after my e-mail, I receive a response from the editor:

Hi, Steven.
The decision to use the letter was last minute and we didn't have a full name available. We only put full names or name withheld.
Cheers,
D.

Well, that makes perfect sense. The magazine didn’t have anyone submit anything complimentary, so they used my letter. Why they never contacted me to know my full name is beyond me (they had my e-mail). Then again, I don't work in publishing.

As a token of my gratitude, I write him something back:

Hi, D.
Thanks again for using my letter.
It’s great to know you honour and respect the rights and talents of other writers. Unfortunately, you have a habit of using the works of others and not giving them credit.
But, what do you know about respecting the rights of writers? You’re a hack editor of a magazine. You shouldn’t know any better, even if my letter was the best thing you published in the past two years.

Don't worry. I forgive you for your moral-less ineptitude.
Oh, and by the way, fuck you.
Best,
Steven.

11 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

A number of years ago I wrote a letter to a fitness magazine telling them how much I liked one of the people whom they featured in many of their articles. The published it with my name - BUT they edited the letter and inserted the name of a person in their paper whom I absolutely did NOT like. I was furious.

March 09, 2007 5:55 am  
Blogger Timmy said...

way to go!

March 09, 2007 7:31 am  
Blogger S.B. said...

The nerve of this guy. Do they KNOW who they are dealing with here?

March 09, 2007 9:06 am  
Blogger Kevin said...

But if that's their standard policy to not post names unless they have the full deal ... then ...

I'm sorry, i don't get why that makes them assholes.

Would they have had the time or a way to follow-up to get your full info?

March 09, 2007 9:21 am  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Haha, nice one, dude, although if it is their policy...
Still, I liked your reaction. I would've done the same thing.

March 09, 2007 9:29 am  
Blogger Threnody said...

Telling people off is one of the great joys in life. When I have a really good tell-off, there's a spring in my step for the next few days, sort of like when I get laid.

March 09, 2007 10:53 am  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I want to know which magazine it was...

March 09, 2007 10:59 am  
Blogger Threnody said...

Magazine Title Withheld

March 09, 2007 12:26 pm  
Blogger A Lewis said...

Dear one, the language! Please. Such filth and four-lettered words coming out of your mouth? How weird, though....for you to see your ownletter. And how messed up (fucked up??) of them to do what they did.

March 09, 2007 9:12 pm  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

"Again, I'm not pointing a finger at you (or the mag), but it has left me scratching my head."

Who would think that an uncredited work would be such a turn-on? ;)Have a good week ahead.

March 12, 2007 12:26 am  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I understand how you must feel. A week ago I had my letter to the editor posted in The New York Times Magazine. But my name got published and I would have been pissed if they would have withheld it, cause it doesn't make sense if they have your name.

March 12, 2007 1:04 pm  

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