Return to sender

Recently, someone posted a comment on my site on what is the correct reaction after receiving a gift that isn’t wanted: Should you grin and bear it, or should you be the “bad guy” and ask for an exchange?

Personally, I’m the sort of person that never asks for anything. It makes my life easier since I don’t have to confront anyone with those uncomfortable talks that start with you saying, “Thanks, but…” and end with them yelling, “Next time, I won’t get you anything!”

When I do ask for something, it’s because I want it badly. I tell whoever is purchasing the gift what I want, the location of the store (with several alternatives), where they can locate it in the store (exact directions), and the cost (including tax).

Nice and easy!

But, with the irony that surrounds me in my daily existence on this planet we call earth (or is it hell?), things never roll smoothly, and a wrench must be thrown into the cog.

Without going into too much detail (yes, I do see the irony of me mentioning it here, and if you want to make something of it, get your own friggin' site), someone has offered me something that I didn’t ask for.

Quite frankly, it’s amazing, but it’s something I don’t want.

It’s the equivalent of the perfect pair of slacks that require no washing and ironing, make me look five pounds thinner (shut up for those who know how much I weigh) and make my ass perkier than Hilary Duff after chugging a six-pack of Red Bulls.

But, they’re radioactive.

Do you accept something that you really don’t want, but accept for fear of negative reprisals? Do you decline something that may be of (eventual) service to you, and that you could grow to love?

Either way, it’s a draw. There is no winner or loser.

Argh!

I’d rather not get offered anything. It would make my life so much simpler.