I'm not your bitch, don't hang your shit on me.

Tuesday, September 05, 2006


Even though I am in my 20’s, there are days that my body doesn’t agree with me. There are days when my bones audibly crack. It’s as if I need to carry an oil can with me for to lubricate the occasional eee-aw eee-aw sound of my rusty joints.

Apparently, 20 is the new 80.

Recently, I woke up one morning with an excruciating pain in my torso. For some reason, I pulled muscle in my chest and the pain went from my left pectoral muscle to my back, including under my arm and parts of my abdominals.

It hurt to move that I yelped a few times like a dog when I mistakenly tried. So, I didn’t move… for two days.

Rather arrogantly, I didn’t take any pain medication. I thought, I’ll be a man and not a pussy. What a stupid decision. I should’ve just drunk myself into submission.

A few days later, I woke up with a crink in my neck. The pain was between my shoulder blades. I couldn’t move my shoulders up or down, which is difficult when you have to reach for anything.

Again, I made like stupid and didn’t take any pain medication.

Could age be the culprit behind these recent issues? What about genetics? Or am I mental and imagining these ailments?

The only health problem I have is a respiratory one, and when I mentioned this to someone, they laughably joked I was broken.

Lovely. Broken in my 20's, yet I lost the receipt for an exchange.

The last thing I want is to preserve myself by taking copious amounts of pills while slathering my body with creams that are supposed to help with numbing the muscles.


I am not looking forward to my 30’s.


Blogger Lemuel said...

Steven, I relate to your desire not to be dependent upon pills and chemicals, but take care of yourself! The left side pain sounds serious enough (unless you know how you did it) to have sought medical opinion.

Perhaps your pains are the worlds way of telling you that you are not immortal (as we all firmly believe in our youth). That is not all bad. Once we grasp that truth, we are actually liberated to live the rest of our lives.

Here's hoping you are feeling much better quickly!

September 05, 2006 6:12 am  
Blogger Kelly said...

Lordy... I know what you mean about body aches... and I am in my 30's and is not getting much better...but i have been going to the gym for the last 9 months and aches are not as often... but if 20 is the new 80...does that mean 30 is the new 90...then I am up shit creek...hehehe... love the blog

September 05, 2006 7:13 am  
Blogger tornwordo said...

I hate to break it to you, but it's all downhill from here. I share your aversion to docs and pills, but sometimes they can really fix you.

September 05, 2006 7:22 am  
Blogger Jeff said...

It just gets better!

September 05, 2006 9:36 am  
Blogger Kevin said...

I had a similar instance recently with my left shoulder/neck muscle. Like I was getting stabbed with a serrated knife repeatedly. It hurt so much so that I audibly whimpered everytime it hit.

September 05, 2006 10:50 am  
Blogger Knottyboy said...

Honey I wished I was broken and looked that good. One of my biggest turn-ons is when I jump some guy's bones and they turn to powder. Now THAT is hawt!

September 05, 2006 11:55 am  
Blogger Steven said...

Lemuel: I'm better, thanks for asking.

Kelly: Using the "new" math, I'll say your calculation works.

Torn: It's been downhill since 19, so...

Jeff: Great. Now I have a good reason to stop getting out of bed in the morning.

Six: Exactly. I whimpered too when I forgot I couldn't move. It hurt like a bitch.

KB: Turn to powder, huh? Dust to dust and all of that...?

September 05, 2006 7:19 pm  
Blogger Not so Single Guy said...

I'm 30..just turned last month. It is not that bad..I feel happier.

Why have you not added a link to my site?

September 06, 2006 2:23 am  
Anonymous Glenn said...

Why do I have no sympathy for you whatsoever? I'm 44...wait...34. Don't talk to me about your aches and pains.

September 12, 2006 9:40 pm  

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