Judgy wudgy was a bear

Whenever you write an amusing e-mail or IM note to someone, there’s always the chance the other person won’t get your humour and end up thinking you’re being judgemental, pointing a finger at them.

There's a lack of context: a tone of voice, or facial expression to fill in the whole picture of a true intention.

Unfortunately, there are times when no matter how hard you try not to sound judgemental, you do, even when you think it’s for the best.

In all honesty, I do think a fuckbuddy who lives close by is convenient (Just think of the speedy service!), and healthy diet choices should include a selection of high-fat and zero-nutrition foods (Give me a bag of Doritos, and watch it disappear in seconds!).

But, there’s only one time where being judgemental - to hell with tone of voice, or facial expression - is really the only way to go…

That big, old, orange couch in your living room is unattractive (in fact, it’s pretty damn oogly) and no amount of fire will make it look any better. Don’t worry, I’ll light the match. It’s the least I can do. I mean, what are friends for?