Walking the dog

When e-mailing from work, it's always best to refrain from using R-rated words in order to bypass certain "flags" that arise in the system's server. Type a word like penis or vagina, and a mainframe flashes a red signal, then a group of little men show up at your desk, take a hold of your computer, and remove you from the premises.

Hence, a code is developed.

Although there are many terms that can mean one two different things (ex: stuffing a turkey does make you sound like Martha Stewart), one of the best ones is this: walking the dog.

It's the multi-purpose, be and and end all of code terms for work e-mails.

Think about it...

Your dog stays inside all day, in a small and cramped space. It's frustrated. It wants to get out. It needs air, some exercise to stretch its legs and flex its muscles. The animal wants to release some tension, over and over and over again, if possible.

Isn't it a crime to be cruel to your pets? If you take care of them, they'll give you so much happiness in return.

Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to take my big ol' dog for a nice long walk. The longer, the better. Of course, he also likes it when someone - besides its owner - does the walking for him. Any takers?