I'm not your bitch, don't hang your shit on me.

Monday, April 24, 2006

Mourning after pill

Every day, millions of dollars are spent on the R&D of drugs designed to help people with their problems – depression, anxiety, etc.

But, some people would rather have a pill that allows for complete memory loss, helping them to forget memories (and pain) they’d rather not remember. Surprisingly enough, not one drug company - from Astra to Zeneca - has ever designed such a drug.

Why not? Why not create a pill that would allow people to remember the past? The immediate past? Yesterday. A pill that makes one want to relive that day because of its fond memories already starting to fade.

Not a morning after pill, but a mourning after pill.


It was perfect weather for January. The skies were clear and blue, and the temperature was moderately nippy, without a sign of windchill. The peacoat I was wearing kept me warm, as well as the extra five pounds I was carrying on my frame from the past several weeks of gorging on too many fat-laden meals.

As we sat in the empty restaurant, eating our delicious food, my friend surprised me with paying for my lunch as well as giving me some boozy goodness in the form of a couple bottles of wine. It was very kind of her, considering her budget for such extravagances was limited.

When we purchased tickets for an overrated movie at the local cinema, I couldn’t help notice that I was being checked out. Why, I don’t know. Maybe they thought we used a coupon (the movie prices did double from the week before).

While doing some shoplifting at Canada's premiere department store, even my friend noticed I was being checked out, again. Interesting. We ignored them while throwing the occasional cashmere sweater and Jo Malone cologne into our bags.

When we escaped the authorities with our quick wit and Alias-esque disguises, went out for coffee (the said friend paid, again) and the eyes would not stop looking at me. Fuck. Did I have a big zit on my forehead? Is that what it was?

After we decided what we would keep from our “shopping excursion” (and what would be returned for store credit, or sold on eBay), we said our goodbyes and went to our respective homes.


The day had everything: adventure, affection, attention, and alcohol.

It didn’t matter that I didn't get a lot of cards, phone calls, or e-mails (for those who did send something my way, and you know who you are, thank you for remembering).

It was a perfect day. Exactly what I wanted.

If I could relive that day when I'm feeling a little sad, I would. Alas, there is no pill that can do such a thing.

Thankfully, Pfizer has a whole slew of pills that can take care of a mild case of depression.


Blogger toobusyliving said...

Happy Birthday. Sometimes fun on a "budget" can be the most fun of all. I was reading about a study that has linked a blood pressure medication I take to the ability for people who take it immediately after an intensely traumatic experience to soften or ease their perceptions of the event. Personally, I'm thinking of going from once to twice a day - one for my blood pressure, the other for whatever should come between me and the happiness that my Friends at Wyeth (Effexor) supply me with daily.

April 24, 2006 7:42 am  
Blogger Kevin said...

I thought Happy Birthday too ... then I noticed you mentioned January ...

I'm confused.

But hang in there ... we're here for you if you're feeling down.

April 24, 2006 8:20 am  
Blogger Steven said...

This was written the day after my b-day in January.

Sorry for any confusion.

As an additional note, I am not depressed (or suicidal).

A little drunk, maybe, but not depressed...

April 24, 2006 11:42 am  
Blogger toobusyliving said...

drunk is good.

April 24, 2006 3:59 pm  
Blogger tornwordo said...

I've found that MJ "eases my perceptions of events" as TBL said.

April 24, 2006 4:48 pm  
Blogger Knottyboy said...

Can you imagine how grateful billions would have been if mother bush would have popped a pill after pappa bush plowed her field?

April 28, 2006 11:11 am  

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