I'm not your bitch, don't hang your shit on me.

Friday, April 21, 2006

Suffering from a case of digititis

There isn’t anything electronic that spontaneously breaks or fails around me. It can be the smallest of gadgets to the largest of appliances – nothing escapes my wrath.

There was a television that already had a few issues (thanks to my father’s tinkering) and when I turned it on, the screen’s colour changed from green to blue to green to static to black. Then BOOM! A few seconds later, smoke was coming out of the back of the box.

There was my first computer (IBM, p.o.s.) that crashed the first time I turned it on. Things never improved (and those condescending bastards at customer “support” didn’t help, either).

There were CD players that only spun CDs so quickly, the cabinet on which it rested shook like it was possessed and cassette players that don’t play cassettes, anymore.

There was a VCR that chewed up tapes and literally spat them out.

There were remote controls that didn’t change channels (although later I found out it my psycho Sibyl of an ex-roommate broke it after letting it fall too many times on the floor).

There are Web sites that don’t work when I’m on them (yahoomail and hotmail are culprits) or crash/freeze when I log on them.

And, recently, there have been issues with my blog template and header (or lack of one). After trying to add a header I “designed” by altering the template, my site was shut down for two days. If I wasn’t dead-ass broke, I’d pay someone to stick the damn thing in the template, so I wouldn’t have to worry about throwing the computer monitor across the room in a fit of rage.


But, no matter what happens, I feel as if I can never shake off this case of digititis. It will only get worse before it gets better.

If it gets better.


And, as an aside, if anyone knows how to help me out with the template, or how to pop my header in this template without fucking up the site, please e-mail/contact tell me.

Fuck. I’ve aged about seven days over this shit.


Blogger Kevin said...

I'd offer to help ... but with me it's a lot of trial and error ... and I don't know when I'll actually be home at the computer to be able to walk you through it (by looking at mine).

I'm useless ... get over it.

April 21, 2006 8:18 am  
Blogger tornwordo said...

You're cute when you're surly.

I wish I could help you. I had a similar experience getting the stupid crow onto my site. I don't like it now, but can't remember how I did it, so I can't change it, lol.

April 21, 2006 8:20 am  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hey Stephen - don't know if this is what you're looking for but there is a css style in the template called #main-top ... it lists the width and the image source it uses for the header. The easier thing to do is just insert a ready-image in the same dimensions into that css.

if you want to redo the actual code then remove the css and scroll down (or copy the code into a text editor of some sort) and search for the tag that reads (and the blogger won't let me put any actual html code in here so hopefully it makes sense):

Top Paper Graphic
div id="main-top" /div

that's where it calls the css from above. leave the div code and insert your code with the right width etc as above.

hopefully that helps. if not - sorry :)

Jen (not sclizzizi, not T&A) :)

April 21, 2006 3:19 pm  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

woops ... i meant to say leave the open div and close div tags but take out the reference to the id tag. then insert your own html.


April 21, 2006 3:21 pm  
Blogger Steven said...

Six: Thanks for the note.

Torn: Surly? I've heard much worse.

Anon: Thank you Jen (not Sclizzizi or T&A) for your help. It was greatly appreciated.

April 24, 2006 12:15 am  

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