I'm not your bitch, don't hang your shit on me.

Tuesday, December 12, 2006

DIY makes me high

The worst part of every paint job isn’t the prep, the trim work, or the actual painting. The worst part entails the clean up – specifically, anything that has to do with the brushes. It’s messy, but someone has to do it. And, that someone is usually me.

Since the paint is latex-based, a little bit of water and a lot of patience are the only things required. But, this time, the paint was on one brush for a little longer than normal. It’s dry and hard. The bristles don’t bend. So, out comes the paint thinner.

The brush is placed – vertically – in a can filled with thinner for it to work its magic. When it’s time to wash the brush and remove any excess paint, it bristles are rinsed under a running tap of hot water.

As I’m rubbing the bristles with my thumbs, I lean in over the sink, not expecting anything in particular. Then it hits me.


The smell slams into me like a brick wall accelerating at 200 km/h, my face ramming into the powerful aroma of the paint thinner. My head spins from the impact, I bounce back, and my ass hits the ground.

Although the scent is almost undetectable, it’s incredibly potent. It’s no surprise addicts soak rags with this shit. Inhale a few times and get lost in the reverie. Unfortunately, the high is as great as the crash.

Should I purchase new paint brushes, or should I let someone else paint the room for next time?

Whatever happens, I'll make sure to have some extra paint thinner on hand.


Blogger Timmy said...

Oh Steven, huffing paint is so 1990.

December 12, 2006 8:10 am  
Blogger Pablo said...

Even Timmy doesn't huff, anymore.

December 12, 2006 9:04 am  
Anonymous smacr said...

Weed is a better high, without the crash.

Lurker turned commenter, as demanded!

December 12, 2006 12:21 pm  
Anonymous smacr said...

Oh yeah... I buy new brushes every time I paint. I figure it costs about the same as buying paint thinner, without the huffed high.

December 12, 2006 12:23 pm  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I believe the instructions say: " use in a well ventilated room".

December 12, 2006 2:24 pm  
Blogger your judgemental aunt said...

Buy a new brush. They're just like you...
cheap and not reusable without a lot of extra work.

December 12, 2006 4:08 pm  
Blogger madamerouge said...

You must buy your poppers at Costco. In vats.

December 13, 2006 12:14 am  
Blogger Kevin said...

I knew your stripper story was about painting. I'm so smart.

December 13, 2006 8:39 am  

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