I'm not your bitch, don't hang your shit on me.

Monday, December 25, 2006

Not so silent night

Family. Food. Farts.

Fuck.

It's just like every other (gassy) holiday.

10 Comments:

Anonymous Glenn said...

My nephew received a "fart machine" as a silly Christmas present. (He's 12; they appreciate those kinds of gifts at that age. And no, I did not give it to him). I should have sent you one.

Merry Christmas S.

December 25, 2006 3:55 pm  
Blogger Lewis said...

What? No frilly, frumpy, or fucked up? How diappointing.

December 25, 2006 4:44 pm  
Blogger Timmy said...

drunk.

December 26, 2006 7:28 am  
Blogger Kevin said...

Festive.

December 26, 2006 9:25 am  
Blogger Steven said...

Glenn: Admit it, you gave him that fart machine.

Lewis: Ok, I changed it (I had to - it was taunting me).

Timmy: I was the designated driver, so, not this time.

Six: Festive. Yeah. Ok. I can work with that one.

December 26, 2006 10:44 am  
Blogger fakir005 said...

If you are going to FART make sure you are not constipated. Because if you are you'll smell. Use a tea spoon or two psillium seed hulk (skin) atleast twice a week. A good source of Psillium seed is Metamucil (a brand name I've nothing to do with and I make no money if you buy). Use plenty of water if you want to drink it like juice. Psillium is a fiber that acts like a laxativee if you are constipated. But it stops your diarreah by absorbing water from your system.

I had a very lonely Xmas day. Not really. I had Xmas dinner at Sheraton. Actually they have teamed up with Madison Square Garden and served meals at Felt Form. Sheraton has been doing it for a number of years although last millenium they were doing it in one of the Sheraton Kitchens.

I take metamucil though and I don't fart. What Else I can Say.

December 26, 2006 10:45 am  
Blogger Kelly said...

you made spit up my screwdriver... too fucking funny!!! Hope you had a great holiday!! kelly and jeff

December 26, 2006 11:05 am  
Anonymous Shaney said...

lol I was just telling Lewis how my Father favors his farts be at the dinner table with visitors...Glad I boycotted the whole Christmas deal this year...xox

December 27, 2006 5:32 pm  
Blogger knottyboy said...

I thought that was rudolf and satan [sp?] buzzing around my house. Nope just a gassy queen trying to take in the sights before bedtime.
kb

December 28, 2006 11:06 am  
Blogger The Thunderbird said...

Oh god this is like the funniest Christmas blog I have read this season. Pure haiku.

December 29, 2006 7:32 pm  

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