I'm not your bitch, don't hang your shit on me.

Thursday, August 09, 2007

Stretch marks the spot

Pregnancy can be a bitch. Not only is there the issue with the weight gain, the nausea, the cravings, and the bloating, but after the child is born, there are stretch marks.

Sadly, you don’t need to give birth to a baby to have them.

Whether it was due to a growth spurt, or a fat period, I have stretch marks. Large ones. They line my lower back like cracks in the Grand Canyon. There are several that go from one side of my pelvic bone to the other, and there are also a few on my thighs, which is strange since I’ve never had skinny legs.

They don’t particularly bother me, but they’re really noticeable. Because of the colour of my skin, they stand out like a white bathing suit on an over-the-hill Miami matriarch who spends too much time by the pool without a stitch of sunscreen (or clothing). It’s times like these I wish I didn't have cocoa-tinged skin.

Stretch marks can’t be removed, no matter what cosmetics companies, cosmetic surgeons, and dermatologists tell you. They’re like constant reminders of a period in your life.

Maybe it’s a good thing the stretch marks (like the period in my life) are behind me. The wrinkles on my face, on the other hand, are a little harder to ignore.


Anonymous Cooter said...

Watch what you say about Miami matriarchs, you young whipper-snapper! (And I like your "cocoa-tinged skin")

August 08, 2007 11:09 pm  
Blogger tornwordo said...

I've got those on my thighs too. It's natural! Embrace it. Give them names, love them, and they'll love you back, lol.

August 09, 2007 7:37 am  
Blogger Lewis said...

Me love to get down and take a look at your SMs for you. I'll provide a diagnosis and answer afterwards.

August 09, 2007 11:20 am  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Another shared trait, though mine are only on my inner biceps, for some reason. Sometimes with tanning, they're not so obvious, I think.

Yeah, it's a reminder of the past. A useful reminder that they should never be filled-out again.

August 09, 2007 12:41 pm  
Blogger Spamouflage said...

We're never happy, for me, it's my giant ears. At least you can hide your SMs (not that you should or not that it's a big deal). Yikes, my point, however lame, is that we need to play the cards we were given.

August 09, 2007 7:22 pm  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I honestly have met very few people who don't have them somewhere on their body. Even super skinny people get them.

August 10, 2007 11:53 am  
Blogger franck said...

I have them on my lower back too. Always assumed it's from a growth spurt. Can't say they bother me, mainly since I can only see them in a mirror and even then only if I contort myself

August 11, 2007 12:08 am  
Blogger Roy said...

I am skinny (never been over-weight), and I have almost those exact stretch marks on my lower back!!!!

August 13, 2007 7:35 pm  
Blogger madamerouge said...

Vitamin E oil is supposed to help deal with them. But then you have to deal with being covered in an oily, sticky mess.

August 14, 2007 8:54 pm  

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