I'm not your bitch, don't hang your shit on me.

Friday, August 03, 2007

Twinkie

As B and I are sitting outdoors on the patio near the sidewalk, the conversation veers from work to age/aging when I mention that I have a lot of time to figure out what to do with my life because I consider myself to be young.

To paraphrase B, he makes a reference to my age and says that my twinkie years are almost over. To be honest, I’m not sure I am (or ever was) a twink.

According to the urban dictionary:

“The stereotypical twink is 18-22, slender with little or no body hair, often blonde, dresses in club wear even at 10:00 AM, and is not particularly intelligent…

There are two major theories about the origin of this word, both of which probably have elements of truth to them.

a) Twink comes from an acronym T.W.I.N.K. "Teenage, White, Into No Kink."

b) Twink is a shortening of the name for the famous "TWINKIE" snack cake: a tasty, cream-filled snack with no nutritional value. The phallic shape of the "TWINKIE" snack cake should not escape the reader's attention.”

For starters, I am not between the ages of 18-22. My body type is not slender, and it never was when I was 18-22. There is (a little) body hair and it isn’t blonde. I don’t ‘do’ club wear. But, the worst offender is that twinks are not particularly intelligent. If you call me stupid, you better hide ‘cause I’ll come looking for you, and when I find you, you better watch out.

Anyway, I never liked Twinkies because I always considered myself to a Hostess Cupcake: dark on the outside, with a creamy filling.

Mmmm… creamy filling.

11 Comments:

Blogger Random Thinker said...

the minute you figure out what you wanna do when you grow up, or stop imagining things you wanna do, well, then, that's when you really are old!

glad you're not an old fart just yet.

August 03, 2007 8:25 am  
Blogger Chris said...

Great. Now I want a twinkie. A case of em. I will never lose weight for my vacation!

August 03, 2007 10:00 am  
Blogger Lewis said...

Twinkies are good. Especially with kahlua drizzled over them and topped with fresh cream.
PS...as a sidenote....two old posts of yours came up in my feedreader this morning "Bleaching the Kids" and you being age 20. Weird.

August 03, 2007 10:21 am  
Blogger Mike said...

I was told on my 25th birthday that my twink years were over. I see now my friends were being quite generous in giving me three extra years!

August 03, 2007 10:30 am  
Blogger Steven said...

To clarify, 'B' was referring to my age, not about comparing me to an insipid, skinny runt.

August 03, 2007 10:45 am  
Blogger Eric said...

Wait, your body type isn't twink? Then what the hell is it?!?!

August 03, 2007 11:01 am  
Blogger hot-lunch said...

hmm let's see: Teenage? nope. White? nope. Into No Kink? Nope.

i am definitely not a twink.

August 03, 2007 12:15 pm  
Blogger Kevin said...

Ummm, your body type is slender. If you can compare your bosy to Jake Shears (and you have), you fall under the slender category.

Still not a twink, but tight and slender.

August 03, 2007 12:38 pm  
Anonymous Cooter said...

Did I mention that I really like Hostess cupcakes, cupcake?

And you most certainly are slender? What else would you call yourself?

August 03, 2007 6:03 pm  
Blogger Sh@ney said...

heya babe..this is for you too...*winks*

Hi friends,
Just a 'quicky' to let you know my blog address has changed LOL
The old address was too similar to that of 'Pride of Place' & I have been asked to change it.
New address is
http://blogshaney.blogspot.com
Sorry for the hassle
Hugs
Shaney

August 04, 2007 12:30 am  
Blogger Sh@ney said...

Hmmm And I forgot to mention 'twinks' are painful to look at and watch, I know I didn't act that way when I was in my 20's. I just wanna bitch slap some of em. Mind you most of them are so bent on drugs they wouldn't remember it anyways!

August 07, 2007 9:14 am  

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