I'm not your bitch, don't hang your shit on me.

Monday, October 23, 2006

Passive-aggressive bitch

The packages of chocolates and picture hooks are almost falling out of my hands, since I didn’t pick up a basket on the way in. I need to find the checkout now. While I’m walking towards the sounds of ringing cash registers, I notice there are a few queues open.

Before I get to the queue that appears the shortest, a woman approaches the checkout, pulling her daughter behind her by her arm and talks aloud about what she’s going to do next.

As she’s looking up at the ceiling, with her back turned towards the main shopping aisle, I move my way past behind her padded jacket and place my items on the conveyer belt.

Clearly, she’s offended as she snaps around with the velocity of a pithy comeback.

Well," she begins saying out loud, "it’s a good thing mommy didn’t stand in line, because this man walked in behind her and took her place…”

Bitch, please. I roll my eyes so far back, I can see her behind me without turning around.

“Well, if mommy hadn’t been walking around in concentric circles, looking up in the air instead of standing in line, this man wouldn’t have taken her supposed place,” I say under my breath, but loud enough for the people in line to hear.

Just who does she think she is? If she wants to stand in line, stand in the line. If not, move the fuck out of the way. And, don't play the victim, you passive-aggressive bitch.

After my chocolates are rung through, I see the same woman pulling her daughter around the aisles near the checkout lines. She’s still walking around in circles.

I, on the other hand, am leaving with my purchases.

11 Comments:

Blogger kevin said...

Hi, ive just come across your blog.

I understand what you mean about the problems in the queue. I had a woman in a car to busy with her kid and she failed to give way to me crossing the road. i got across ok but she looks at me as if IM IN THE WRONG!

Have a better day tomorrow mate.
Kev in New Zealand.

October 23, 2006 2:21 am  
Blogger Lemuel said...

HOO-ha! I love it when I real about subtle justice going down. Way to go! [Although I secretly wish you had shouted your comment in her face, but that would have been rude. LOL!]

October 23, 2006 6:08 am  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

HEY! JUST because I can't control MY kid, don't go bitchin' about it online...;0)

Sounds fair to me. I'd have done the same thing. Make no mistake.

October 23, 2006 7:37 am  
Blogger Timmy said...

I am sure the child will be scarred for life. It was all the childs fault, anyway.

October 23, 2006 8:49 am  
Blogger Kevin said...

Hey, give her a break. She doesn't get out of her single-wide very often.

October 23, 2006 8:50 am  
Blogger madamerouge said...

I love it. I also love chocolate.

October 23, 2006 10:42 am  
Blogger Jason said...

I have thought about doing a post on women and how they walk while shopping. I figured if I generalized that way, I'd catch tons of flak, but seriously...

Men walk in straight lines to their destination and women walk like a spirograph.

And no, I wasn't born in the 60's.

October 23, 2006 12:33 pm  
Blogger S said...

Kevin: Welcome. And, I've got a story about the same thing that happened to you. Sadly, she wasn't nice.

Lemuel: That would've been rude. And, I am not rude... just mean.

JUS: Hey, lady! You deserved it.

Timmy: HA! That's just as bad as blaming the dog.

Six: Sadly, she was a total soccer mommy.

MR: What I do for chocolate.

Jason: I walk the exact same way; blinders and straight ahead.

October 23, 2006 12:53 pm  
Blogger Single Guy said...

Meow...I try not to let other people piss me off. It is just a grocery line queue

October 23, 2006 10:09 pm  
Blogger savante said...

Some people just don't get out too often.

October 23, 2006 10:26 pm  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Jason (from Canada) is so full of shit....I've seen him walking around the supermarket, and he's going in circles. Such stereotypes.....either i'm gay or not all women walk in circles....although I DO pull my daughter by the arm. :O

October 25, 2006 9:09 am  

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