I'm not your bitch, don't hang your shit on me.

Thursday, February 26, 2009

Say cheese

Every day for breakfast I make a sandwich with two slices of multigrain bread, two slices of cooked turkey, a slice of cheese, and some seasonings so it doesn't taste too bland. It's filling and the keeps me from having an energy crash too early in the morning due to its mixture of complex carbs, protein and fats.

But, this morning is different.

With my third sandwich bite I notice something I haven't noticed before. It's slightly rubbery and lacks flavour. When I take another bite, I realize I can't break through this membrane of sorts. Is it the meat? Has it gone bad? Is it the cheese? Is it old and too tough to bite?

Actually, it's neither. It's a piece of plastic.

In the rush of making my breakfast this morning, I removed a slice of cheese from the package and didn't peel off the plastic that separates the slices (or else they'd all stick to one another). And because I'm practically asleep when I make my breakfast, I have to be reminded of that fact whenever I'm munching on a slice of plastic instead of a slice of cheese for breakfast.

Stupid plastic.

12 Comments:

Blogger Doomed But Cheerful! said...

Gosh - this is WONDERFUL! I can almost taste the Kraft plastic ...
G =]

February 26, 2009 1:02 am  
Blogger Tristan said...

Did you use any margarine? Apparently margarine is one molecule away from being plastic...

February 26, 2009 2:26 am  
Anonymous Peter said...

Plastic is without calories, what a great way of losing weight.

February 26, 2009 3:06 am  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Any cheese that is sold with plastic separating the slices is not far off from plastic itself. Such "cheese" probably is impervious to the passage of time, and might not even be biodegradable. And you eat it every day. Barf.

February 26, 2009 8:49 am  
Blogger S said...

It's not Kraft processed cheese, it's Havarti that's cut and sliced at the deli.

February 26, 2009 9:38 am  
Blogger Phronk said...

EVERY day? I'd get sick of that so quick. I sometimes switch what I'm eating halfway through a meal.

February 26, 2009 10:29 am  
OpenID christopherc said...

ahh, the fabulous taste of deli-plastics! Although, havarti when allowed to over-age can be just as resilliant to the tongue!

February 26, 2009 2:56 pm  
Blogger Atari_Age said...

Hey, at least it wasn't a thick layer of biofilm-grade mold/fungus/gunk growing on the lower half of the bread.

February 26, 2009 4:07 pm  
Blogger Wilfried said...

It's not the plastic which is stupid. It's only your missing mindfulness. Don't blame the plastic, rather blame you.

February 28, 2009 7:24 am  
Anonymous johnmichael said...

I was thinking something worse than plastic was in the sandwich. At least it was only plastic.

February 28, 2009 3:20 pm  
Blogger DTNZ said...

I cant tell you how many times I have done this. And I couldnt even blame sleep for it :)

PS - love to add your blog on mine.
Its a great read and your seem like an interesting guy.

Damien
http://2centsworthdownunder.blogspot.com/

February 28, 2009 4:06 pm  
Blogger Doomed But Cheerful! said...

Havarti! Epic. They make it just down the road from my house, and I cook with it at least once a week ... so if you ever fancy changing breakfast locale for a few days, give me a shout!
G =]

March 04, 2009 5:07 am  

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