Mixed messages

The main difference between humans and animals is the ability to speak. Unlike animals, humans are able to fuck up the most basic of communications by giving, receiving, and processing mixed messages.

There are times where women are guilty of reading into actions that mean one thing instead of another. We met for coffee means we’re going steady. We took a walk around the neighbourhood becomes we’re buying a house. We had sex turns into a wedding announcement in the Times.

You’d think that men don’t think that way, but you’re wrong. Some of them do, and they’re just as bad as women. You gave me a nasty look in a seedy bar means you want me. You didn’t throw a drink in my face when I slurred something dirty in your ear means you’re turned on by me. You stopped slapping my hand away after repeatedly groping you means you wanna get fucked by me.

But, in the end, when it comes to communications, it’s all about a ring: a diamond one for her, and a cock one for him.

Maybe Tiffany’s does both.

Note: I'm pretty clear in communicating with people, unless I'm being vague.