I'm not your bitch, don't hang your shit on me.

Wednesday, August 06, 2008

Sabotaged

In the matter of a month, I sabotaged two relationships. Even though I don't know what really happened in each case, I am the common denominator.

N acts as if I don't exist after the last time we see one another. There is no rhyme, nor reason, and it still hurts no matter how much I try to forget.

J tells me I can't be trusted because I never tell the truth. My attempts at clarification are for naught. It's over after it started so incredibly well.

Although there are a variety of reasons as to why they don't want anything to do with me, I think it's because I try too hard to give them what they want while losing myself in the process. No longer am I the person I think they like me for, but I turn into the person I think they want me to be.

Sadly, the person they want me to be isn't the person that I am. Since two people don't live inside me, I begin to act strangely (and a little stupid from the confusion) because there are two kinds of personalities fighting each other. They not only sabotage me, but sabotage others.

And even if bad things come in threes, then I have a feeling I'm going to sabotage another relatinship pretty soon.

7 Comments:

Anonymous peter said...

Next time be yourself and don't become someone you think they would like.

They have to take you as you are!

August 06, 2008 7:07 am  
Blogger Lewis said...

What do you mean that there aren't two people inside you? I thought there were multiple personalities inside all of us!

August 06, 2008 3:21 pm  
Blogger Naijadude said...

You can only be the person you WANT to be..... so yeah you my friend is letting yourself go!

August 06, 2008 3:51 pm  
Blogger The Impeccable Mister Polo said...

gosh you sound like me... are you a gemini?

August 07, 2008 1:56 pm  
Blogger hot-lunch said...

i wish i had two people inside of me, if you know what i'm sayin', unnnkay???

August 07, 2008 5:29 pm  
Blogger Jay said...

At least you have identified the main source of the problem. You're not being yourself and that's definitely something that you should do,

AND, Instead of bad things come in threes, think "the third time's the charm."

August 07, 2008 8:12 pm  
Blogger The Naked Drag queen said...

You sound to me like another frustrated actor. The right guy will see through the performance and like what he sees. Generally though I don't get involved with couples to be on the safer side.

August 11, 2008 11:12 am  

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